What is acting out? In my experience, I have learned that healthy sexuality is not what the world defines it as. Sex is linked to love, which is not meant to be selfish or self-serving. Despite popular belief nowadays, sex can never replace a lack of connection. In recovery, the term “sexual acting out” refers to unnatural sexual desire that is outside of love and meant for selfish pleasure or pain relief. This includes but is not limited to: objectifying women, watching pornography, masterbating, cheating on a partner, lusting after women, etc. These are the main forms of “sexual acting out,” but can lead to more extreme actions, such as rape or abuse. This is a simple definition for now, but there are many layers that we will cover later.
Why is this #1? How come needing the desire to stop acting out takes the cake here. Plain and simple. In the amount of recovery rooms that I have been around, there is a common denominator between the guys who stay sober and the guys who continue to act out.
The men who stay sober for long periods of time, they all have that desire to stop. Its extremely important to them, and they will do whatever is necessary to stay sober. On the reverse side, the men who struggle are the ones who don’t take sobriety seriously and are lukewarm to staying sober.
Its really as simple as this. IF you want to stay sober then you will. Sometimes things happen and life and there is a relapse, but if you have the desire you can stay sober without relapses. Your choice. Do you want to stop or not? What are you willing to do? What are you prepared to give up?
My desire to stop acting out happened the day that god told me he loved me. it just made sense now that I wasn’t living for me, but for the creator of everything. He had a different set of rules which i had to choose to follow and live by. That set the tone. I wanted to stop. Now i just had to figure out how to stop.
Want to find out how? Keep reading.
God Bless!